I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
birth control should be required to get into college
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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