Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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