watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Just pee around me
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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