she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Randomize
