Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
