Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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