Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
