How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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