She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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