Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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