he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
