im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
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I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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