i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
