I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
