Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
