it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
There was a lot of him and a little penis
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
