when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You made out with two different species that night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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