I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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