can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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