: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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