I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
