lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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