I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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