the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Im part way to drunk.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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