you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
