I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You need a sexual gate keeper
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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