It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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