Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
