Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize