how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
