If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
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