We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
honey bunches of taint.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
