i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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