If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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