You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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