Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
