You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Randomize