You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain