Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
