Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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