I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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