she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
