never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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