he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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