Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
