I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
