they need to just BURY HIM!
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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