But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
