Heybabeimwearingurpanties
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
