I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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