the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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