My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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