State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
